Friday, July 27, 2007
Okay, let's start with the clean stuff. Aquafina -quelle surprise- is just tap water.
Like people with brains didn't know all along.
Instead of being sued or fined, they now, like other bottled water fraudulent conglomos, simply have to label their water as PWS, aka "Public Water Source."
So, if you ever bought it, you were an idiot. If you still buy it, you're an idiot.
I never liked running around with bottled water like a dehydrated doof at Burning Man; I mean, not in the gym, not in the office. I refill with filtered tap water or the wonderful luxury of jugs of (alleged) spring water at work.
Even when I'm on a long bike ride, I don't worry about getting dehydrated, because I know within an hour or so, I'll find water. Okay sometimes I bring some, but it's really not worth paying $2 for a bottle of what is -for now- relatively free. I use filtered tap water with a little lemon juice or vitamin C powder.
So those who were hoodwinked a billion or so dollars ago by Evian (Naive spelled backward) deserve to have lost their money, but the billions of plastic bottles and packaging loops now choking and killing seagulls and fish globally are having a worse effect on the planet than some less than perfect tap water is on your kidneys.
One place where people probably drink a lot of bottled water - well, beer, apparently- is the Muddy Buddy Ride & Run. It's got events in several cities throughout the year. Apparently, people like to get all coated in mud, sometimes near a horse run. Ew, sounds icky. But you know, people like to get all wacky and zany for no reason at all. In certain communities, like the gay one, it's called a fetish. But for these hearty mostly straight folk, it's just good clean, er, muddy fun.
The course involves tandem running, riding, and dragging oneself through a mud pit, while trading a bike through the course. It seems similar to the Marine Mud Run, only without as many hot military studs.
Grand Poo, bah
I guess I could give something like that a try once, but today I wasn't even up for Critical Mass, despite a few friends' invitation. I'm happy I finally got back to the gym during my lunch break, after being away for days.
See (this is where it gets kinds gross), I got what I think was food poisoning early Tuesday morning.
I think it was a steak burrito I bought at Trader Joe's. It may have been partially my fault for letting it sit in the refrigerator a few days too long. But still, I only cautiously returned to shop there today. After two days of diarrhea, a short bout of barfing, and managing to get to work for a few hours every day to get the basic needed stuff done, I lost eight pounds! Not exactly a recommended diet plan. I'm still eating lightly, and have sworn off red meat forever. Ick!
On top of all this, I had a sunburn on my back from last weekend's biking and hiking, and in between flushing the toilet dozens of times (and freaking out my fussy downstairs neighbor), I was slathering aloe vera and lotion on my arms and back.
There's always a spot on the middle of my back where I can't reach. I recall a trip to Florida when I coated myself in sun block while at the beach. I kept missing one spot on my back, and ended up with a house-shaped sunburn right in the middle. So this time, I used a ladle from the kitchen. While laying around like a slathered, stomach-grumbling mess, I read two books.
Throne of the Idiot
Anyway, while on the subjest of toilets and their contents, down in Florida, a real shit of a politician is continuing his idiotic campaign to defame gays.
Fort Lauderdale Mayor Jim Naugle has made himself a real turd, by claiming that gays hang out in toilets. His proposal is to make the city pay for expensive electronic toilets that force the doors open after a few minutes. That's supposed to stop gay sex.
Like the barf and other, uh, stuff, I spewed a few days ago, Naugle spewed more vitriol against gays.
UNITE Fort Lauderdale is asking people to Flush Naugle, but not boycott their city.
TowleRoad and JoeMyGod have a lot more about the potty-mouthed Naugle, including video of a "Flush Naugle" rally.
Now, ain't that the shit?
In completely unrelated news, New York magazine reports that nearly 40 percent more surveyed straight people are into anal sex.
A quote from a male (not the one pictured!), cribbed via JMG:
“My wife is totally turned on by the idea of ‘having’ me, as that’s just not something women really get to do most of the time, and it’s not something that guys have usually had done to them. It really is a reversal in the most primal of ways. I think anyone who doesn’t enjoy it or thinks they wouldn’t is hindered by their own hang-ups. It feels good, period. And breaking taboos is sexy. Variety is sexy. Being vulnerable is sexy.”
Just don't have a steak burrito beforehand. Trust me.